Pope Francis Celebrates Joy of Family Life

Pope Francis addressed 100,000 people at St. Peter’s Square in the Vatican last October 26, 2013 during the Year of Faith celebration of family life. “A Catholic wedding is not simply a beautiful ceremony; through the sacrament of marriage a couple receives from God the grace they will need to fulfill their mission in the world,” Pope Francis said.

Catholic-San Francisco wrote that vowing to love one another in sickness and health, joy and sorrow all the days of their lives, Catholic couples put their lives in the hands of God and rely on him for strength.

The faithful who attended the celebration, from children to grandparents, were invited by Pope Francis to speak to him and the crowd, to share the story of their family lives. “The sacraments are not decorations in life; the sacrament of marriage is not just a pretty ceremony. Christians celebrate the sacrament of marriage because they know they need it,” added Pope Francis.

Read more at Catholic-San Francisco, the official newspaper of the Archdiocese of San Francisco.

Photo from wikimedia.org


Husbands Are More Under Pressure by Marriage Gems

My kids and me

I’ve been a subscriber of “Marriage Gems” and would recommend Lori’s blog for your habitual reading on parenting and parenthood. For today, it’s a topic us men can relate, to wit, “Are Husbands under More Pressure than Ever?

Here are a few quips to her newest article:

Experts are now saying working fathers are experiencing the most pressure in families, even families in which both spouses work.

This is the final discussion of the research coming out of Time Magazine’s August issue. It shares a report by the Families and Work Institute, which surveyed 1,298 men.

Men who are experiencing overwhelming stresses should discuss their feelings with their wives in a way that is not accusatory.

Read more at Marriage Gems


Does delaying sex make better relationship results?


Photo by josefoshizzle at Flickr.com

A new study in the American Psychological Association’s Journal of Family Psychology finds that couples who delay having sex have better relationship results.

A statistical analysis of 2,035 married individuals studied showed the following benefits enjoyed by couples who waited until marriage compared to those who started having sex in the early part of their relationship.

  • Relationship stability was rated 22 percent higher
  • Relationship satisfaction was rated 20 percent higher
  • Sexual quality of the relationship was rated 15 percent better
  • Communication was rated 12 percent better

Read more at All Headline News

Did We All Really Marry the Wrong Person?

In our younger days, we all went looking for the best partner in life because our parents and our friends always told us, “You deserve the best!” As we grew older and older and unmarried, some of us would have settled for good, not the best. For those who thought they found the best and lost the marriage, does the cycle start all over again?

I found this article (as Steve Jobs would quote it) “insanely great!” It started out with “We All Married the Wrong Person” but ended up telling me so otherwise. Here are some quips to the blog-post by Lori Lowe:

Couples in crisis often reach the point where they decide they are just two poorly matched people. This precedes the decision to leave the relationship and go in search of that “right person.

If we think we know a person well when we marry them, we are temporarily blinded by our love, which tends to minimize or ignore attributes that would make the relationship complicated or downright difficult. No one gets a guarantee of marrying the right person so you should assume you married the wrong person.

People are happier with the choices they make when there are relatively few choices from which to choose. With too many choices, we can become overburdened and regretful and constantly question our decision.

We need to say, ‘This is the person I chose, and I need to find a way to develop a sense of closeness with this person for who he or she really is and not how I fantasize them to be.’”

Read entire article at Marriage Gems

Photo by adwriter at Flickr.com

Working Abroad May Affect Your Family If Not Planned Properly

While I was surfing around, I bumped into a whie paper with the title, “The Uninsurable Social Class? A Marketing Stance by Jomar F. Rabajante of the University of the Philippines [March 24, 2008], which discusses the social and economic dimensions that have a significant impact to the Philippine life insurance business. [Click here to read the paper].

One of the topics of that paper involved is the “Who’s Who” in going up the so-called “social ladder.” It says, “It is economically impossible for most Filipinos to step up into the social class ladder if they get same-same income. One needs to innovate to go up (as shown by some rags-to-riches millionaires).” In that paragraph, it lists some of the “Filipino ways” to innovate and lends some short comments about some of these:

  1. Going abroad to get a higher paying job;
  2. Becoming an entrepreneur (but there is a big probability of failure — *tell me about it*);
  3. Being promoted or looking for greener pastures in the Philippines (but competition is high and the increase in income is slow);
  4. Getting high commissions (but if the person has the skills in selling);
  5. Investing (but this is usually the way of the upper class only, since they have enough capital to have a higher yield);
  6. Marrying the rich (but the rich usually marry the rich);
  7. Gambling and winning big (but if the person is lucky enough); and
  8. Acquiring large amounts of money from illegal transactions (of course, this is unethical, very illegal and is not encouraged).

Today, as these points are all very common in us Filipinos (except the last point), everyone thinks that the fastest way to innovate with lower risk is to become an Overseas Filipino Worker (OFW). That hurts the family in many ways regardless if it’s the husband or wife who leaves the family for work abroad. In its worse result, it destroys the family where both spouses maritally separate and leave the children wondering what they did wrong to deserve a broken family. I know a few families where separation was a result of working outside the country, including my own. The money is great but, in the end, I and many others have come to realize it wasn’t worth zilch! The cause of the marital failure was when you stepped into that plane bound for some place where you thought you could provide happiness to your family through money.

If you or your spouse intends to go abroad to work, the ability to resist temptation and loneliness, plus putting anger way, way below understanding, love and compassion because one is physically away and can’t even help in the domestic demands of the family, has to be at the highest peak and form you have ever gone through in life. Trust me to say that you will confront all these, in one way or another, large or small, and your deep understanding about your chosen faith, marriage and parenting is your only ally to succumb negative emotions, ingest sincere compassion and move forward towards solutions and your dreams and ambitions of having a happy family.

Tough? Yes, very. Impossible? No. You and your spouse have no choice but keep meeting half-way every single hour and day. And I’m not just talking about the one who was left at home; it includes the breadwinner who thinks that only because he or she is bringing the bacon doesn’t mean he or she has the authority to dictate his or her terms. If both of you can come to terms on the many, many things about marriage, faith, relationship, children, in-laws, household chores and needs, bills payment, income, insurance, car, mortgage, school, friends, Sunday gatherings, church, telephone calls, e-mails and chats, vacation trips, new things to buy, and so many more, then you and your family will be more than fine — and the experience will make all of you a stronger family unit.